Cee The Sex Lady:

Hi, and welcome to From The Heart Side Out-- a show where we dive deep into the real conversations about relationships, intimacy, and mental health. I'm Cee, The Sex Lady your guide, through these rich and sometimes challenging waters. Whether you're here to nurture your personal growth or seeking professional insight, this space is for you.

If you enjoyed today's episode, be sure to subscribe and share with a friend. Head to the show notes for any resources mentioned and for more information about connecting with me or our guest, have a question you'd like answered on the show or just want to say hi? Email me at podcast at cee the sex lady.com. I'd love to hear from you!

Let's get started.

Hello, and welcome to From The Heart Side Out. I'm your host, Cee The Sex Lady. I'm a sex and relationships therapist and sex educator. I'm so glad you're here. Today's episode, our very first episode, is setting the foundation to let you know what from the heart side out is all about.

Each episode begins with a segment we call Sex Ed you wish you had. Raise your hand if you feel like the sex education you received in middle school or high school just didn't cut it, left you with more questions than answers. And now as an adult, you're trying to navigate all of these conversations seemingly by yourself.

Well, here at From the Heart side Out, we want you to know that you're actually not alone. We're here to help you figure out these things, help you have these conversations, and continue to improve your sexual health and wellness. Today's edition of Sex Ed You Wish you had is all about the heart. Did you know sex is actually good for your heart health?

There's research that shows that sexual activity helps our brain and body release helpful hormones that lower our risk of depression and anxiety, which helps your heart function better. Sexual activity can also lower your blood pressure, reduce stress overall, and improve the quality of your sleep. So keep that in mind.

The next time you're wondering, what are some steps that I can take to improve my heart health? I wanna be heart healthy. Sex may be just the thing you're looking for.

Now getting into the meat of today's episode, let's get started With this being our very first episode. I thought it might be kind of cool to talk a little bit about why I named this podcast from the Heart Side out.

I'm a firm believer that connection is really integral to the human experience. It's a really big part of who we are, an important part of who we are and how we experience life in the world around us. And that's not exactly a, a, a new concept. You know, there's all sorts of research and, and historical evidence that shows that people are relational.

We're social beings. I thought it would be really cool to focus on how the symbolism and the meaning of the heart itself has kind of evolved throughout time, because that's a really key factor in why I decided to name this podcast from the heart side out. So we're gonna take a little stroll through history and talk about the symbolism of the heart, the symbolism that, that we've come to associate with emotions, connections, relationships, intimacy, love, romance, all of those sorts of things.

Our first stop is ancient Egypt. So the ancient Egyptians believed that the heart was really the center of who a person was. It was the source of intellect. It was the source of morality. The heart had a lot of significance in their cultural and spiritual practices. For example, when someone died, the Egyptians believed that there was a process that each person's soul would have to endure or under a journey that each soul would take on their way to the afterlife. And a part of this journey was judgment. Many spiritual traditions or or beliefs have some sort of understanding of judgment that there comes a point and at the end of a person's life where they have to account for how they lived, how they treated people, what they believed, those sorts of things.

And in ancient Egypt, one part of that journey was called the weighing of the heart. So what would happen is. After the deceased person had completed their journey through the underworld, they would arrive at what was called the Hall of Ma'at , spelled MAAT. And here this is where would be term would be determined how pure or how good of a life they lived and whether they got to transition into the next level, which was the known as the kingdom of oi.

So after confirming that they were sinless people, pure hearted people. There was a, a final test, which was weighing their heart against the feather of Maat. And so people who were pure hearted and were going to continue their journey into int eternity, their heart would be balanced with this feather. So they weighed about the same.

Folks whose hearts were heavier than the feather of Maat, it was determined that their soul was going to be destroyed for all of eternity. This person now long, no longer exists, and so again, the Egyptians, ancient Egyptians believed in immortality and pure hearted people got to transition to eternity.

Whereas folks with heavy hearts or impure hearts, uh, completely ceased to again because they believed that. The ultimate measure of a person was in their heart, that is the center of who they are, what they believe, their intelligence, all of those things.

So this thought process about the importance of the heart and, and how it was ultimately connected to a person's soul was not just present in ancient Egypt. Also in ancient Greece, the ancient Greeks believed that the heart was the center of the soul, and that it was actually the source of heat in the body, and even in the continents we now know as North and South America, people in those places also held a lot of significant or believe that the heart held a lot of significance.

Ancient cultures in what is now known as Mexico, believe that every person has several spiritual forces, and that many of those spiritual forces leave the bodies at different times. For example, maybe when someone is dreaming, however, the spiritual force that's associated with the heart in this culture, it's called the teola.

It said that this spiritual force must remain within the body at, at all times, or else the person is no, no, no longer living. And so again, it just speaks to even before we understood the medical role of the literal heart, that ancient people and cultures have always kind of had this idea that the heart is really important to who you are.

It's important to the essence of who you are, not just the, the physical, uh, attributes of who you are. Starting in the early 15th century and even before then, we start to see the heart become really important in, in Christian theology and imagery and in paintings and in artwork that represented, uh, spiritual beliefs.

And so there's often images from this time of what's called the sacred heart. It's a heart that glows and is just emitting this light and. It was used to represent Jesus and his love to people. A lot of early believers in Christianity really held a lot of significance in this sacred heart, and it became a representation of the ultimate love, the ultimate connection, and that's still true.

And in some faith communities today, the spiritual significance of the heart is not limited just to Christianity. For example, in the voodoo religion, the heart has become a symbol of love, beauty, and purity. So we see this, this relevance all throughout history and this connection all throughout history, that the heart is associated with who we are and our, at our essence, what it means to be connected to other people, to love, to care, to, to sacrifice for other people.

We see this in other spiritual practices, even in, uh, the, the realm of tarot. If you're familiar with the practice of tarot or, or tarot cards, the heart is also associated with the suit of cups. Which is used to represent emotions, relationships, and the subconscious mind. So again, for a very long time, people have associated the hearts with who we are at our core, what we believe, and how we're connected to other people.

Of course, we can't talk about the heart as symbolism for love and affection without talking about Valentine's Day, and maybe you're familiar with the origin story of Valentine's Day and with St. Valentine, but if not, I'll give you the quick version. So St. Valentine was believed to be a priest or a bishop who was a practicer of Christianity at a time where this was not Oly accepted, uh, practice.

And he actually was imprisoned for his beliefs at one point. Legend has it that he would perform secret weddings for Christians, and this helped Christian men escape being sent off to war. And it was just a way to help people practice a faith that was outlawed or, or not supported at the time. There came a point where he was commanded to denounce his faith, denounce his belief in Christianity, and when he refused to, he was sentenced to death.

Now, some people say that he used to use the imagery of hearts to remind people of their commitment to their faith and remind people of the sacrifice of, you know, practicing their religion in secret. And there are other, you know, historians who say, maybe that's just a thing we say to make the connection to Val Valentine's Day more apparent.

Who knows, essentially. He was martyred and executed on February 14th in the year 269, and that's where we get this celebration of Valentine's Day. It was originally, or it's traditionally called the Feast of St. Valentine, to honor this sacrifice with this man who was associated with. Love and an ultimate love and in sacrifice.

So again, throughout history there has been different beliefs about the role of the heart being, the seat of emotion, the seat of affection, a representation of love and romance, but it's also been portrayed as the source of wisdom or intellect. And actually this is a debate that kind of continues even to today of.

What is the role of the heart versus the brain in our emotions, which is really responsible for our emotions, how we feel, how we think about certain things. And there is some research that shows that the heart and brain actually work together and influence each other when it comes to our emotions. So our brain, when it's sending out certain signals to our bodies, our heart may react in a certain way.

Our heart rate may speed up, for example, when the brain is experiencing anxiety or or noticing some sort of stressor in our life or in our environment. And relatedly. Different changes in our hearts, whether that's our blood flow or our heart rate, can also create emotions that maybe there's no external stressor that says, oh, you should be anxious or worried about this, but the changes in your heart functioning send signals to your brain as well.

Our emotions, our logic, our, our sense of survival is really connected between our heart and our brain. It's not a, you know, which one is the ultimate determining factor. They're really a team. They really do impact each other. So that's important to think about, that your mindset impacts your emotions, your emotions impact your mindset, and that your mind and your body are more connected than it may seem on the surface.

So if you're wondering what in the role does all of this history and a little bit of science have to do with this podcast? I'm so glad you asked. I'm going to tell you the ultimate goal of from the heart side out is to explore not just emotions and affections, but relationships of all kinds. So that's family relationships, romantic, platonic.

Social, sexual, all of these different connections and bonds that unite us. The meanings that we make of these relationships, the experiences we have in these relationships, how we understand ourself and others through the lens of the heart, from the place of the heart, how we can live and love and, and function.

From the heart side out leading with emotion, leading with connection, leading with bond as the, the glue that unites us as humans and as people having a common experience. So yes, I am a sex therapist. We will absolutely talk about sex because there's all types of emotions and connections and, and reasoning that goes into sex.

But I also wanna talk about friendships. And how, you know those bonds shape us and impact our lives. I wanna talk about family. I wanna talk about the relationship itself. Again, the heart and the mind are always impacting each other. So we're going to talk about mental health and how it's impacted by the different experiences that we have, the different relationships and connections that we have, or the ones that we don't have and and desire to have.

So here's what you can kind of expect from each episode. As I mentioned, they will all start with the first segment, sex ed you wish you had, because I imagine there are still questions, there are still things that weren't covered in that middle school classroom with the awkward demonstrations that probably just told you don't have sex.

There's still so much to to learn and to understand about ourselves as sexual beings. Then we'll have some sort of discussion or around our main topic or theme. There may be a solo episode where I'm just kind of explaining some things or setting the pace for some things. Then there'll be some sort of discussion around a theme or around a topic.

For example, today we were talking about the heart and the symbolism of the heart. We may also talk about attachment styles. We'll talk about friendships, the the ups and downs and the joys and challenges of that. So it won't just be solo episodes all the time. There'll also be interviews and conversations with other folks, a mix of professionals who are working in in relevant fields, as well as folks who are just experiencing life as humans who experience relationships and connections and emotions with other people, because I think that diversity of voices and experiences is incredibly important.

I also wanna hear from you as listeners about how you're navigating relationships and connections in your life. What questions you have about sex or sexuality or partnership or all of these sorts of things. And so there'll also be an opportunity for us to share questions or letters from listeners. I wanna hear from you.

I wanna know what's going on in your life and, and help where I can. And, uh, each episode will also include what we'll call a personal practice. How can you apply the topic or the theme of our Episo episode to your everyday life? And, and make it real for you. Some may say, this sounds like therapy homework, and you may or may not be correct.

But the important thing is that it's, it's practice that is relevant to you and in how you can continue to practice and improve the sexual health and wellness of your life. Now I do wanna clarify really quick what it is and what it ain't. And what I mean by that is what you can expect from this podcast and what you should absolutely not expect from this podcast.

So what it is, is educational. There may even be an entertainment component. What it ain't is a replacement for a therapist or a relationship with a therapist in your everyday life, I am a therapist. I am not necessarily your therapist. If you are not my client. I am not your therapist. If you are looking for a therapist, I encourage you now that you can let me know, you can send me a letter and say, Hey, I need some help finding a therapist.

I have no problem helping with that, but so that concludes our introductory episode. I hope you enjoyed learning a little bit about the symbolism of the heart and the role that the heart has played throughout history. Now, I said that every episode would come with some personal practice. However, just like when I'm working with my clients, I believe that the first session is kind of a freebie.

You did the work just by showing up, and so if you made it this far in the episode, congratulations. You did the work, you showed up. So no homework, no personal practice this time, but I, as I tell my real life clients, don't get used to that. Now, if you enjoy this episode, I encourage you to share it with a friend who you also believe will enjoy it.

Don't forget to rate the podcast. Leave a review wherever you're listening. That helps other people find us and, and helps us get to spread the word and spread this knowledge and information. If you have questions that you would like answered on the show, comments you want to share about the podcast, you'll find that in the description as well.

Thank you so much for joining me. Until next time, keep living and loving from the hard side out. Thank you for tuning in to From The Heart Side Out Hosted by See the Sex Lady, produced by Christine Johnson of Pure Pod Vibes and Music by Rico, the artist. If you enjoyed this episode or learned something new, make sure to subscribe, rate and review on your platform of choice, and don't forget to share with a friend so they can learn something too.

I'd love to hear your thoughts about this episode. Please send any comments or questions to podcast at see the sex lady.com. That's podcast at see. EE the sex lady.com. Until next time, keep loving living and leading from the heart side out.